iPhone setup
Lock down a new iPhone in 15 minutes
In 15 minutes you'll have an iPhone that installs nothing, spends nothing, and stops talking at a time you chose — without you hovering over it.
Screen Time looks like it does a lot. Out of the box it does almost nothing, because the section that blocks installs and purchases is switched off by default and the timers above it can be dismissed by the child in four taps.
This guide is the short version of doing it properly. It assumes the phone is new or nearly new, and that you'd rather spend 15 quiet minutes now than renegotiate every night for a year.
Before you start · 30 seconds
- Decide the bedtime before you start. You'll set it in step 3, and you'll want it settled before you're tired and negotiating.
- Have your own phone free. The Screen Time passcode must never be your child's birthday, and Apple lets you attach an Apple ID for recovery.
- Know your child's age. Two of the answers below genuinely change at 13, and one changes at 16.
The steps
Work these in order
0 of 10 done
Tell Screen Time whose phone this is
Open Settings, tap Screen Time, then choose the option that says this is your child's iPhone. That single choice is what lets you manage it from your own device instead of standing next to theirs.
Settings>Screen Time>This is My Child's iPhone
Under 12: If the phone is brand new and not yet set up, do this during the welcome screens and add the child to your Family Sharing group — it's easier now than later.
Set the Screen Time passcode first, not last
This is the step people skip, and it's the one that decides whether everything below holds. Create a four-digit code that isn't the unlock code, isn't their birthday, and that you don't type in front of them. Attach your Apple ID so you can reset it.
Settings>Screen Time>Screen Time Passcode>Use Screen Time Passcode
Watch for this: Without this code, every limit in the next seven steps is a suggestion your child can dismiss on the spot.
Set Downtime — the boundary that runs itself
Downtime switches the phone off at the hours you choose. Set it to the end of the evening through the morning. During Downtime only the Phone app and anything you list in Always Allowed will open.
Settings>Screen Time>Downtime>Schedule
Under 12: A school-night window like 8:00pm to 7:00am is a reasonable start.
Choose what survives in Always Allowed
Decide deliberately what still works during Downtime — Maps, Messages to family, Notes. Keep the list short and on purpose. Anything left here is a window open all night.
Settings>Screen Time>Always Allowed
Cap the categories that get away from you
App Limits work by category rather than by app, so one limit on Social Networking covers Instagram, TikTok and Snapchat together. Start with one category and 45 to 60 minutes rather than a limit on everything.
Settings>Screen Time>App Limits>Add Limit
Switch on Content & Privacy Restrictions
This is the section that actually blocks things, and Apple leaves it off. Turn it on, then under iTunes & App Store Purchases set Installing Apps to Don't Allow, Deleting Apps to Don't Allow, and In-app Purchases to Don't Allow.
Settings>Screen Time>Content & Privacy Restrictions>iTunes & App Store Purchases
Watch for this: This is the step that stops a £40 Robux purchase at 11pm and stops an app appearing that you never approved.
Set the web filter to match their age
Inside the same section, open Content Restrictions and choose Web Content. Two answers are sensible depending on age — one allows only sites you list, the other blocks adult sites and lets everything else through.
Settings>Screen Time>Content & Privacy Restrictions>Content Restrictions>Web Content
Under 12: Choose Allowed Websites Only and add the handful of sites they actually need. It's fiddly for ten minutes and then invisible.
Decide who can reach them
Communication Limits controls who can message or call the phone, and who can be contacted during Downtime. Set the Downtime option to Contacts Only so nobody new can reach them late at night.
Settings>Screen Time>Communication Limits>During Downtime>Contacts Only
Turn on Communication Safety
This asks Apple to blur sexually explicit images in Messages and to prompt before a child sends one. It's a filter with a real ceiling, not a guarantee — but it's free and it's already on the device.
Settings>Screen Time>Communication Safety
Turn on Ask to Buy
With Ask to Buy, an install or purchase arrives as a request on your phone rather than happening on theirs. Set it now and you never have to have the 'why is there a charge on my card' conversation.
Settings>Screen Time>Ask to Buy
Honest limits
What this won't do
Worth knowing
You're not behind — this changed fast
Screen Time's labels have been renamed across recent iOS versions, and Apple moves options between sections without saying so. If a path below doesn't match your screen, the setting is usually one level up or down rather than missing.
Try this
Say the rules out loud once
The settings do the enforcing. Your job is the explanation. One short conversation — here's what's blocked, here's why, here's how to ask me for more — does more than any extra limit.
It won't tell you what they saw
Screen Time reports minutes and pick-ups. It does not show which video, which chat or which server. You're getting a shape of the day, not the contents of it.
It won't survive a factory reset
Erase the phone and set it up again, and Screen Time is gone. That's why the Apple ID and Family Sharing setup matters as much as the settings themselves.
It won't work on someone else's device
Everything here governs this phone. A mate's iPad, a console, a school laptop and a library computer are outside it — which is exactly the moment you want your child to already have a plan.
Printable
iPhone Screen Time: the one-page checklist
Tick these off with the phone in front of you. The passcode is the first box for a reason.
- Screen Time passcode created — Not the unlock code
- Downtime scheduled — School nights
- Always Allowed list reviewed
- One App Limit set — Social Networking
- Content & Privacy Restrictions switched on
- Installing Apps: Don't Allow
- In-app Purchases: Don't Allow
- Web Content filter set for their age
- During Downtime: Contacts Only
- Communication Safety on
- Ask to Buy on
Settings vs street smarts
Controls set the boundary. Judgement keeps them safe when you're not looking.
Screen Time turns the device off at 8pm. It doesn't teach your child what to do when an unknown gamer asks for a selfie, or a 'friend of a friend' offers a free Robux trade. NetWise Kids puts them in a realistic group chat, DM or trade request and lets them practise saying no — before the real one arrives.